One lesson from the Parable of the Unforgiving Servant in Matt 18:21-35 is that as believers, we have received grace from God. When we come down hard on others who sin, it is often true that we have been guilty of the same sin. We need to look at ourselves before being quick to judge others who fall short. We are to be quick to extend mercy to others because we have feet of clay as well.

I recently saw this in action, and it reminded me of the truths the Lord spoke. Maybe you can look at things in your own life and see how this parable works itself out in Christian living.

One afternoon I was driving my two grandsons, ages five and seven, home from the swimming pool. The younger one was in the very back of the SUV, and the older boy was in the middle row. All was quiet until I heard the older one yell out (very loudly), “Stop it!” He was doing his best to reach into the back row of seats in order to hit his younger brother.

I hadn’t heard anything, so I asked the older one what the younger one had done. He said, “He is smirking!” The younger one protested and said, “I wasn’t smirking, I was smiling.” The older one said, “There is a difference between smiling and smirking and you are smirking. Stop it!!”

I have no doubt that the younger boy was egging his older brother on. I don’t know what he was smirking about—probably something that had happened at the pool—but I could relate to his sinful activity. In my many years of marriage, my wife has told me on many occasions that I needed to “wipe the smirk” off my face. My daughters have informed my wife on countless occasions that, “Dad is smirking again.”

Now, I am not always aware of when I’m committing this sin, but the evidence is overwhelming that I’m guilty of it. In that sense, I’m like the unforgiving servant regarding the amount of mercy I need to have extended to me. Evidently, my five-year-old grandson has inherited this trait from me.

How did I respond to what was happening in the SUV? Unlike the unforgiving servant in the parable, I was not quick to judge the younger boy in the back. I could relate to his shortcomings, even if I didn’t know why he was doing what he was doing. I weakly said, “Maybe he is only smiling.”

The older one did not appreciate my response. He told me he was mad at me. When I asked him why, he said that I could make his brother stop smirking but wasn’t doing so.

I didn’t explain to him why I was not as hard on his brother as he wanted me to be. Part of the reason was that, internally, I was laughing too hard. Maybe when he’s older, I’ll explain why I didn’t throw his younger brother from the car. I will explain to him that I’ve been guilty of the same sin, on countless occasions. I understand how easy it is to smirk. Many, including the Lord, have given me grace. I didn’t want to be a hypocrite and act like the unforgiving servant.

I did tell the younger one that he needed to stop smirking and aggravating his brother. Maybe when he’s older, I’ll be able to tell him that smirking will cause some problems for him. For example, his wife won’t appreciate it.

Some will say my response was a tepid one. Others might say I was being merciful.

That trip home taught me a valuable lesson. All of us are quick to judge other believers. In this case, as in the case of the unforgiving servant, it was obvious that I needed to be merciful to the guy in the back seat. I didn’t need to join his older brother in an attempt to beat up on him!

When we see other Christians sin, we can recognize the sin for what it is. But let us all approach it with a big dose of mercy. When we look at ourselves, we soon realize that we, too, need mercy.