Grief is painful. We all face grief often in our lifetimes. Some grief is relatively minor (broken bones, financial losses, crooked politicians and pastors, betrayal, etc.). But when we lose a loved one, the grief can be overwhelming.
One of the greatest Rapture passages in the Bible is 1 Thess 4:13-18. Evidently, in the church of Thessalonica, some believers thought that their loved ones who died (before the Rapture) would miss out on the Millennial kingdom. In these verses, Paul assures them that “the dead in Christ will rise first” and “then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up [raptured] together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air.”
Paul began this section by saying that he was instructing them about the Rapture of believers who had already died “lest you sorrow as others who have no hope.”
By hope, Paul is speaking of the certain soon return of Christ at an undisclosed time. Some do not believe that Jesus is the Messiah and that He is coming again. They have no hope that He will return.
I’ve heard preachers say that Paul was saying that believers should not grieve when their believing loved ones die. But that is not what Paul said or meant. Paul said we should not grieve “as others who have no hope.” The issue is the nature of the grieving.
If your believing spouse or parents or children die, you should grieve.i You will not see them until the Rapture or your death. That causes sorrow. You will miss them terribly. But you do not grieve as though they have ceased to exist or as though you’ll never see them again. They have gone to the third heaven to be “present with the Lord” (2 Cor 5:8).
We know that our believing loved ones who have died will return when Jesus returns. They won’t miss out on the Millennium. They won’t be separated from Him or us. We will be reunited soon. “Therefore, comfort one another with these words” (1 Thess 4:18).
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i The apostle Paul does not discuss how we are to grieve in cases where we are not sure whether the loved one who died was a believer. No Scripture addresses that issue. One thing we should realize is that just because we don’t know of a time when our loved one believed in Jesus for everlasting life, that does not mean that he or she never did. (Only those who believe that one must persevere in faith and good works until death could conclude that a departed loved one is definitely not with the Lord.) That truth provides me some comfort regarding both my parents. Another thing that helps is to realize that even if our loved ones end up separated from us forever, their torment will be tolerable (see here). If they are separated from us, God will give us the ability to handle that without grieving throughout eternity.
